it's not easy being green...
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in the "amer1canad1an" journal:[<< Previous 20 entries]
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04:18 pm
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dumb musician mistake
so i have this church gig where i play a piece called the christmas oratorio for bass by bach. and i went to rehearsal not having practiced it as much as i should have. on the top of my music, the guy who hired me wrote that the piece was for trumpet in d. to my orchestral thinking, i figured that meant that i transpose up two steps from a b flat instrument. WRONG! i went to rehearsal in the wrong key and felt (and sounded) like shit. i was freaking out so much that i pulled the tuning slide out to ridiculous lengths so i could still use the same fingering which made my low register sound like a kazoo. not good. anyway, i check the score today to realize that not only was the trumpet part in d, EVERYONE WAS IN D!!! that means that i was transposing one step too much and that i am an idiot.
the end.
Current Mood:  pissed off
Current Music: i'll be practicing...
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11:12 am
[Link] | so last night, i chilled with ted after wind ensemble. we ended up chatting for so long and he got so hungry that he drove back to the city with me and we ate dinner at around 10 or 11. ted's awesome. he said that during brass ensemble, he spent a long time trying to figure out which guy i'd go for. (none of them ended up working out.) i thought it was HILARIOUS! food was good, too. then we went to a produce store, which was a blast for me, but he was looking at me like i was nuts because i was so excited about everything. oh well. i have italian soda and yogurt pretzels and more tea and now i owe his $10, but it's ok. i got back to purchase at around 2 am. it was so weird because i had no idea it had gotten so late! where did the time go?
Current Mood:  cheerful
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11:23 am
[Link] | as i'm writing this, my hair is turning blue.
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05:32 pm
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whoa, everything's different!
...i mean the format of lj, but i guess it applies to life too.
as i said in my last entry that i put up eons ago, purchase really is fantastic. everybody's finally put their guard down and i have made friends. i even joined the hillel and have had a blast planning events with them. i streaked my hair turquoise and i love how it's turned out! but what i really wanted to post in this entry is about today.
it was raining outside, and i was reading stuff for a paragraph that i still have to do for my college writing class until finally i had had enough and i went outside and played in the rain for a good half hour. and it felt sooooooooo good to go out and do that again. plus, the quad is way bigger than my front yard and instead of having people in cars stare/honk at me, i had people saying things like, "i'm so glad you're doing this!" which to me is pretty cool.
it's nice to feel like a little kid again every once in a while. and to do things just because you want to and they make you happy, especially when you're free from embarrassment. :)
Current Mood:  refreshed
Current Music: sesame street music running through my head
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03:11 am
[Link] | ignore the last entry. purchase is fabulous.
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: tibetan throat singing on npr
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01:47 pm
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ok, that seriously crossed the line...
I don't consider myself extremely religious, but I do make sure to go to the High Holy Day services and even though I am medically excused, I do my best to fast on Yom Kippur...which is why what Sophia said REALLY pissed me off.
A bunch of people were sitting in Kaylee and Caity's room watching a movie. When it was over, she came in and asked if anyone wanted to go to lunch with her. People had already ate, etc. and she looked straight at me and said, "You can't eat. You're fasting." Writing this down I realized that what she said doesn't sound so bad, but you should have heard the way she said it. It was just cruel. How dare she give me crap for trying to do something that I believe in?
I told her what an asshole thing that was to say, and she just said, "Yeah, I'm an asshole". Like she didn't even care what a terrible thing to say that was.
I mean jeez, what's her problem? Couldn't she, out of the goodness of her heart just PRETEND to feel bad about what she said and apologize?
Current Mood: pissed off
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08:52 pm
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fuck
It's starting. I can feel it. And it scares me...
So far, my symptoms are: loss of appetite, overeating despite my lack of appetite, feeling empty, loss of interest in social interaction, self-isolation, lack of desire to practice (I have practiced for a week simply because I don't feel like it).
I'm not saying I'm like this all the time, but I'm scared anyway, so I'm finally admitting to myself that maybe I'm going downhill again. Maybe I'm cycling again. I mean, this is how I started the last time...
Why does this happen? I know that practicing is completely in my control, but I haven't been able to bring myself to do it. I've stood in front of my locker or carried my stuff all around the conservatory looking for a practice space but it feels so meaningless! It's like I'm numb inside. At least I'm getting my other work done, right?
I know that if I tell my mom about this, she'll just tell me to up my lithium dose. And, as usual, I'll refuse. I mean, I don't want to take the fucking pills in the first place so why should I take more?
I feel like crap.
Current Mood:  listless
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04:57 pm
[Link] | it's been a weird day. not bad, just weird.
Current Mood:  annoyed
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05:20 pm
[Link] | oh, and i'm playing second trumpet (out of 2) on dvorak's new world symphony!!!
Current Mood:  excited
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10:24 am
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YAY!
i got my first paper back this morning...
14/15, baby!
AAAAAAAAANDDDDD
it was used as the model paper for the class! i've NEVER had my papers used as model papers.
so excitedddd!
Current Mood:  bouncy
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03:14 pm
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best email ever
this was from my professor...
From: Roberts, Bryan
Sent: Thu 9/7/2006 11:48 AM
To: GREENBERG, SAMANTHA
Subject: Sorry
Samantha,
It just occurred to me that I've been calling you Hannah in class, which, in fact, is not your name. Sorry and please correct me if I do it again.
BR
I read it again and it still makes me laugh
Current Mood:  silly
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12:36 am
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What? I was all worked up for nothing?!
So I have successfully gone through a full week of classes. So far, I really like all my professors... except maybe the guy who runs chorus. He's so intense and there's something about him that freaks me out. Also, he made all the nonmajors stay for a lecture about how the voice work that made me almost cry out of boredom. I may not know all the scientific jargon that he was throwing around, but i do know how to breathe properly, sit properly, and sing properly. Haven't I been taking private voice lessons since the eighth grade? On the plus side, we ARE singing Handel's "Messiah". And that is pretty freakin awesome.
The people here are REALLY friendly. When I walk around campus, about 70% of the people I pass smile, wave, say hi, etc. Complete strangers! It's so nice. Also, the people I've met in the music department are wonderful. All of them have been great about making me feel welcome on campus and they all treat each other with such respect! It's great.
Sure, this place isn't perfect, but the good overshadows the bad by a landslide.
My suitemates are pretty awesome, too.
That's all for now. Happy Labor Day Weekend everyone!
Current Mood:  content
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06:29 pm
[Link] | Reply and I'll give you a letter.
Find five songs that start with that letter.
Post them to your journal.
Crap. I have W.
Wild Horses - The Rolling Stones
Wild Thing - The Troggs
What a Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong
Where Have All The Cowboys Gone? - Paula Cole
When I Fall - Barenaked Ladies
Wait! I thought of one more!
What's Love Got To Do With It? - Tina Turner
Current Mood:  tired
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09:46 pm
[Link] | holy crap i'm going to college in two days
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09:15 pm
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my hero
so i was at this brass chamber music thing and mostly it was not too much fun, but if i'm gonna remember one thing, it'd be this:
my group did this crazy macedonian gypsy piece called "doise". and it was really awesome and ridiculously hard. anyway, so my buddy pat, who was the tuba player, introduced the piece. And while he was introducing (this is the piece, blah blah blah, it's from the gypsy culture, it's most likely a wedding song, etc. etc.), he put on this bright blue bandana, took off his shoes, unbuttoned his shirt, all while continuing to calmly talk to the audience (that musta taken some SERIOUS balls)! then he picked up the goofyass sousaphone he "borrowed" from his old high school and we started to play.
it was pretty fuckin awesome.
Current Mood: silly
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12:32 pm
[Link] | children of eden ushering tonight...
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04:56 am
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so much to say
so yeah, i haven't updated for a while, or at least it feels that way. mywe tour was awesome, but it was also sad cuz it was my last tour. there's a reunion for the tour people coming up but i can't go. shame. all my pictures from the tour are on my facebook, so feel free to check them out (and comment!)
orientation was not much fun, but i'm tired of talking about it so i'll just leave it at that.
in other news, i'm home again for most of the summer and i'm getting PSYCHED for abq06. also, i went vegetarian this week. my body feels better. :) that's all for now!
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01:06 pm
[Link] | not that this matters since i graduated south but...
HOLY CRAP LINDE'S BEEN PREGNANT FOR FOUR MONTHS AND I HAD NO IDEA!!!
Current Mood: annoyed
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07:45 pm
[Link] | ily leah
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11:33 pm
[Link] | So, here's my day, in chronological order, Roses and Thorns style.
- I volunteered at an SGF yard sale and made a killing in the clothes department (4 shirts for $3.50!): Rose.
- I went to Molly's graduation party and broke off her brother's side view mirror on the way there: Thorn.
- I saw lots of people I knew at the party: Rose.
- They were very cliquey: Thorn.
- I drove home and no one was there so I was all freaked out and depressed: Thorn.
- I realized that what I had been saving as trip spending money is going to repair the car: Thorn.
- And that said money isn't enough for the repair: Thorn.
- I went to Tim's graduation party: Stem.
- I went to the OES show: MAJOR Rose.
- I saw Whit!: Somewhere between Rose and Stem.
- I got the band to sign my favorite shirt (the One Eyed Stanley one): Rose
- I hung out afterwards and helped clean up: oddly enough, a Rose!
- I lost my car for a bit: Thorn.
- Now I'm home and tired: Stem... it's to be expected after such a big day.
That's all for now.
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